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Lenny Cavallaro's avatar

Great column! I'll add the following:

You have a decent start there, Son! Now, if you REALLY want to be a man, learn from some of my lessons. I always floss my teeth with barbed wire, and I use a barber's strop -- usually just the threat of the strop -- to make sure the women [plural] obey me.

By the way, I was out of action for a couple of days. You see, I went downhill skiing but ended up tackling a tree. Cuts above and below my right eye, a broken nose, a couple of loose teeth, half a pint or more of blood, some cracked ribs...and when that quiche-eating dude came running over to tell me they had called for an ambulance, I got to my feet, kicked him in the balls, and spat on him.

If you're looking for a good beer, I recommend Thug Lite. It's a fine chaser -- if you need one -- for that moonshine I drink before breakfast.

....and when you've graduated from Tate's course, I invite you to sit in on mine!

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